How Conservatives Fundamentally Misunderstand Art/Entertainment

I’ll preface this by saying I’m referring to a specific vein of American religious/economic conservatism and am speaking generally rather than universally.  When it comes to people there are always exceptions to the rules.

I was tempted to write this after I heard that vice president-elect Mike Pence showed up to a showing of the stage hit Hamilton and was booed by the audience.  While he was leaving a member of the cast made a statement about the goals of the show that was, in essence, critical of the upcoming administration.  He was far more polite and loving in his statement than I think I could ever manage. Continue reading

The Election

Well, it’s over.  There are about a hundred things that are over for me.  My idea of America as a nation of freedom is over.  Any hope I had left in humanity as a broad concept is over.  The last bit of attachment I have to my homeland is gone.

The nation has gone and elected the least-qualified man in history to its highest office.  I’m writing this at 3:40 in the morning because the stupidity of my species has taken sleep from me, among the hundred other things I mentioned. Continue reading

New Novella Announcement: Manifest of the West

Hello readers, followers, and whatevers.  I have completed another new novella that I will be posting here, free to read, starting tomorrow.

It’s called Manifest of the West and as you might be able to guess, it is a western.  It’s a fantasy western set in a magical alternate wild west where the land to the west is literally ever-expanding.  It’s strange, humorous, and surreal.  It has boxing cacti, horses buying train tickets, salivating hellmouths with gold teeth, a beaver dam city, and a hundred other peculiar things.

It’s based on a lot of early ‘big man’ folklore and if it sounds at all interesting to you you can come back and check it out tomorrow.  I encourage you to do so.

I Wrote a Fantasy Novel Set Entirely in a Public Restroom

Shut up, yes I did.  This is not a joke.  Well, it is a joke… but it’s a two hundred page joke that takes itself very seriously.  It’s called Captain Rob Fights.  One day I had a thought: What if I set a high fantasy in the lowest of places?  It was originally going to be a short story, but then I had another thought: What if I stretched this one ply concept beyond all reason?  Yeah, I’ll do that.  So I did.

porce map
See?  I even have a Lord-of-the-Rings-style map!  It’s totally a legitimate fantasy novel.

If you don’t believe I have that kind of free time, I’ll be posting the first part tomorrow and then adding one a day until the whole thing is up.  You’ll see my excessive and strange version of toilet humor.

It has all the fixtures you’d expect of the genre from strange creatures and ancient magic to powerful relics and jaw-dropping battles.  It also has all the fixtures of a bathroom… from sinks to hand dryers.

It tells the tale of an adventurous and occasionally cruel sink pirate and his crew as they struggle to mop up somebody else’s mess.  He has to use every tool at his disposal, like knowledge of the strange language Pawtymouth, if he is to stop religious zealots from ending the world at their most sacred location: the glory hole.

I encourage you to stop by and check it out.  I really did it, I swear.  I really spent that long in the bathroom making crappy jokes.

The Caloric Kiss Announcement

Hello again internet.  As you may or may not know, I post a lot of original science fiction and fantasy work on this blog that is completely free to read.  I’ve just completed a new novel that I will be uploading in parts, starting tomorrow and continuing every day until it is all up.

The book is called The Caloric Kiss: A Pseudoscience Tryst.  Its premise is simple: what if all the antiquated ideas about science had turned out to be correct?  In the world of the book the Earth is flat, Lamarckian evolution proved truer than Darwinian, snake oil is a true panacea, and caloric is the very substance of heat.  Many of the earliest works of science fiction were called ‘scientific romances’, so I’ve decided to take a pseudoscience tryst.

If this sounds interesting to you I would encourage you to follow this blog and read as four adventurers go up against an epidemic of spontaneous human combustion, a town obsessed with watermelon, robot photographers, and many other strange things!

If you enjoy it you can look at the tabs atop this blog and search them for many other free stories!

Jungle Book and the Digital Divide

I saw the new Jungle Book.  It is a solid film, but one issue really sticks with me.

Several flaws are obvious: the musical numbers are forced-in and tonally jarring, its remake premise sucks out much of the excitement, and the animals would simply look ten times better if their voices were essentially telepathy instead of having mouths meant for crushing throats or unhinging their jaws flap all over the place.   Continue reading