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Twitch Stream Story: Orkh No Move Two Space Back!

~ Blaine Arcade ~ Leave a comment

The piece was delicately cradled in the soft palm of the young dusk elf. Her name was Nystro, but her name mattered very little at the moment. To her the only name that mattered belonged to the piece. In her hand was a likeness of her species, its wooden legs rounded to look like the bottom of a column. Its face was placid, but she sensed worry from it. Worry over the name.

There were two more new pieces in the grand game hall that day. They were held in different hands. One was firmly held in the greenish grip of an adolescent orkh. Its teeth were expertly painted with mother-of-pearl powder, so it would glisten on the tiles of the miniature battlefield. It was crafted by Ancho, and he was very proud. It would bellow its name in the middle of the game, and draw gasps from every adult around. He would be a revolutionary. Perhaps his people would turn him over the fire that night as punishment, but something had to be done. Continue reading →

Twitch Stream Story: Understuffed

~ Blaine Arcade ~ 1 Comment

Being on call nearly seven days a week was not working out for Miser Hank. Sewhole Hospital was extremely prestigious, and he had hoped for less of a workload upon transferring. His old hospital, Webtoe General, never made it into the medical scrolls. They had him sewing up splitting spell wounds and prescribing vitamins for lizard familiars.

Sewhole dealt only in human patients, magical humans of course, but even without patients literally crawling over his shoes he was still drowning in work. That was why, once he arrived home, a lovely little condensed apartment magically stuffed inside a fur coat pocket in a fashion museum display, all he could do was collapse against the door and groan. Continue reading →

Twitch Stream Story: Colorful Apes

~ Blaine Arcade ~ Leave a comment

There was no consensus whether or not that morning’s rainbow was an omen. They were scientists; they didn’t generally believe in such things, but their hand was being forced by the times. The year was 1972 and research was still years behind the drug culture of the sixties.

That’s why the facility existed. It was supposed to help them catch up in various fields, most of them involving the strange psychosis-inducing substances that had leaked into the counterculture of the past decade. While their regulations were strict, their moods had to be loose and flexible, for beyond those bland brick walls, strange things happened nearly every day. Continue reading →

Twitch Stream Story: Rustgut the Talented

~ Blaine Arcade ~ Leave a comment

Deanna’s soup arrived. Everything looked normal. It was hot. Bits of meat bobbed up and down in the yellow broth. There was a full layer of sunken barley on the bottom, like pale river stones. She couldn’t stop herself from breathing deeply and craving the food. She threw her hands over her mouth and leaned backward, nearly falling off the bar stool.

The other patrons turned and scowled in her direction. They were enjoying their soup very much. Giles’ Bubbling Pot had quickly become the number one eatery in town. Even in the middle of this blazing yet rainy bayou summer, folks came from everywhere for a bowl of the turtle soup. It was one of those recipes good enough to pass through generations, and they were lucky enough to taste its first form before reincarnation. Deanna could show a little respect. Continue reading →

Twitch Stream Story: The Manual Descent

~ Blaine Arcade ~ Leave a comment

It looked exactly as it did on the page. Tyler’s eyes jumped between the book and the creature before him: lithe, faceless, and with countless ribs visible through its tight pale skin. Should he be surprised that it looked so similar? The creature was a mimic after all. That’s what the bestiary entry said.

Mimic

Class three monster

Arcane nature

Rare status

Possible drops: skin cloak, perfect mask +2, and shattering claws Continue reading →

Twitch Stream Story: The Lovely Creatures of Salmontown High

~ Blaine Arcade ~ Leave a comment

Sammy walked out with the bell blaring overhead. He was out. He was free. School was done for the summer, and this was high school, so he would be able to ratchet up the sort of trouble he had planned. Adults would no longer get mad at him; they’d threaten charges. Did you need at least one charge to be a man? You certainly needed at least one date.

Why am I hearing Mr. Sorkinson’s voice? He’s narrating my life! God, has my imagination always been this out of control? Sorkinson’s a drama teacher, of course he made everything sound like there was something at stake. Continue reading →

Twitch Stream Story: Walk out of a Bar!

~ Blaine Arcade ~ Leave a comment

So, a duck, a fish, and a snail walk into a bar…

They had had a particularly long and difficult week. The duck’s feathers were drab and disorganized. The snail’s slime trail was more phlegm-like than usual thanks to a recent cold. That’s what happens when you get passed around so much between mouths and ears. The fish was extraordinarily thirsty, and the fare at the bar was destined to be unsatisfactory. Continue reading →

Twitch Stream Story: How Long do ya Think he’ll Last?

~ Blaine Arcade ~ Leave a comment

“We ate yesterday!” Monica the mouthy scullery maid argued.

“No we didn’t, and we’re dying. You can’t hear that tummy grumbling?” Arthur said, angling his head to look into the kitchen. Between them sat Ophelia, who, at the moment, listened with tight lips. “Poor O’s nothing but skin and bones.”

“I don’t think she even gets hungry anymore,” a salty Caribbean sailor, sans shirt, said as he walked out of the bathroom and moved into the game room. Continue reading →

Twitch Stream Story: The Legendary Taco

~ Blaine Arcade ~ Leave a comment

Hi, my name is Karen and I’m a foodee. I admit it. I think about food morning, noon, and night… and at snack time. I was blessed with the metabolism of a caffeinated lightning bolt and it would be a shame if I didn’t use it right? If you’re a human who can eat cake, steak, and potatoes without waistline woes, you do it. It’s your duty.

That’s why I started this blog; I thought I could share a little bit of that joy with everybody else. Then we blew up! We’re currently the number five food blog on all of blogchug.com. You guys have been sending me more and more requests, and they keep getting stranger! I went to South America and tried those spices from extinct plants. I went to the Ukraine and had that cheese they tell you you can’t eat if you’re over thirty. Continue reading →

Twitch Stream Story: The Warmest Egg

~ Blaine Arcade ~ Leave a comment

The oviraptor was an egg thief, one of the best of the Mesozoic, but one of their number failed so spectacularly that history did more than record it. It became a story told across super-continents, across ages, and even between the planets of the Milky Way. The oviraptor, were she intelligent enough to speak, would not call her heist a failure.

The egg was special; she knew that the moment she snatched it. It had a shell of two components: half metal and half glass. The glass was full of a reddish-amber liquid, like the blood of ancient trees happily spilled. Within the liquid grew an embryo, unlike one that came out of Mesozoic eggs. The first thing they learned was that it couldn’t be eaten, at all. The strongest beaks and claws had no effect on its material. They dropped rocks on it. Not a scratch. Defeated and hungry, the oviraptors didn’t know what else to do with it. They threw it in with their own eggs and waited, occasionally mesmerized by its pulsing warmth. Continue reading →