novellas

Justice Backers: The Lichen Calls (Part Two)

~ Blaine Arcade ~ 2 Comments

(reading time: 50 minutes)

Monkey Girl Diary #488

(transcribed from video log)

Hello everybody. We still not heard anything from Transplant or Pawn. Dreamweaver is here with us; she is looking into our heads at night for signs of psychic badness. To this point she has found nothing. I think she is in my head right now, but I will not be sure until tonight. If she is in here with me, I have some questions to ask her.

You see I am having a problem with my puppy… but it maybe just a problem with me instead. When Alpha Dog gave Golden Boy and me our puppies we were very excited. I name mine Honeydew and he name his Trophy. Alpha Dog explained to us that the puppies have a program that makes them mimic their owner’s personality. I think this a great idea, but it is hurting Honeydew. I do not know if robots can be hurt, but it looks like Tin Soldier can and the puppies sometimes whimper so realistically. Continue reading →

Justice Backers: The Lichen Calls (Part One)

~ Blaine Arcade ~ 4 Comments

JusticeBackersCover

(reading time: 45 minutes) (reading time for entire novella: 3 hours, 31 minutes)

Sportfish Independent Backer Update #14

(transcribed from video log)

Hello again friends and supporters. Thanks to the mention I received in yesterday’s The Daily Pills, my donations are up sixty percent. That means many of you watching this are new to the Sportfish program; I’m going to give a quick history lesson to catch you up. If you’re a veteran at this point you can just click here and skip ahead to my big news.

If you’re wondering if my operation has any relation to the eastern and western superhero teams called the Justice Backers, the answer is yes. The creator of that program, Alpha Dog, is my uncle. About a year ago I flunked out of college. I will not work retail. I will not wait tables. I will not make beds. I will not sit at a desk and help people who don’t matter make appointments that don’t matter. I am an adult human being in the twenty-first century and I refuse to let my life get flattened and paper-clipped that way. Continue reading →

Justice Backers: Secret Shuffle (Finale)

~ Blaine Arcade ~ 2 Comments

(reading time: 54 minutes)

The following is a record anonymously donated to the Justice Backers by a member of the Gamedreamy staff. Gamedreamy is an up and coming site where individuals livestream the playing of video games, board games, and card games. Though Secret Shuffle is banned on their service, one individual managed to complete a stream of four whole games. The individual in question goes by the name Swagglerock69, a handle he regularly uses to harass members of the Justice Backers and their community.

Each phase of the final game of the stream is reproduced here to help you understand the mindset of SS players and the consequences of the game itself. All card names have been redacted.

TRIGGER WARNING: The conversation taking place contains swearing as well as language that may be offensive to women and the LGBTQIA+ communities. Continue reading →

Justice Backers: Secret Shuffle (Part Three)

~ Blaine Arcade ~ 2 Comments

(reading time: 46 minutes)

Salt Shaker’s Skin-Crawling Fan Fiction Corner

The move to the Bay has derailed much of our lives. Do. Not. Worry. All of the fan fiction is intact. Deckard and his goons might be able to stop us, maim us, kill us… but he cannot stop the power of socially awkward people intent on writing themselves into history as war heroes and legendary lovers.

I’d initially intended to introduce you to various authors in this series, but few of them can compare to Kharmie Buttercup. As long as she churns them out, we’ll be turning to her for all our needs. This week’s selection has a few interesting details, including a footnote (placed nowhere near the foot of the page) about Salt Shaker’s Fan Fiction Corner. It seems she’s spotted us. We’re no longer observers. Our presence in her habitat has made her hostile, so she’s incorporated our images and attacked them as a warning, puncturing the copies and filling them with venom. You do have to be careful when a fan writer feels threatened. Continue reading →

Justice Backers: Secret Shuffle (Part Two)

~ Blaine Arcade ~ 2 Comments

(reading time: 56 minutes)

Electric Eel Diary #29

(transcribed from video log)

Diary number twenty-nine without accidentally slipping on my own slime and killing myself during a mission. Good work everybody. Add another tally to the board. Eventually I will at least slip; it’s inevitable. I just hope that when I do I slide into a bad guy and knock him over so I can claim it was intentional.

I do have a big thing to talk about today. Most of you have probably seen Alpha Dog’s unboxing video, but I’m going to tell you about the parts that got edited out. I know he would rather I didn’t, but once I talked to everybody else about it I was sure I had to say something here. Continue reading →

Justice Backers: Secret Shuffle (Part One)

~ Blaine Arcade ~ 4 Comments

JusticeBackersCover

(reading time: 49 minutes) (reading time for entire novella: 3 hours, 25 minutes)

Backer Update #51 (Game Over)

“With the inherent callousness of governments that try to care for more than seven billion people it is inevitable that some oil will need to slide between the pieces of the machine to keep us humane. The Justice Backers are that oil.” – Ember Joseph, The Daily Pills

Do you like that beautiful quote backers? That’s us they’re talking about. In The Daily Pills! The most read site among people who have a specific chair for reading. This is actually the first positive quote we’ve gotten from anyone on their staff since we started. That Donovan guy called us ‘vigilantes safeguarding only fetishized anonymity’. Their head politics reporter Miriam said I was ‘a jumping-off point for campaign questions and nothing more’. With how much the world talks about us it’s almost like I am something more. It’s almost like the name Alpha Dog means something to people who happen to not be me. Continue reading →

Justice Backers: Finale

~ Blaine Arcade ~ 2 Comments

(reading time: 52 minutes)

Golden Boy Diary #38

(transcribed from video log)

Hey guys. Okay, so… I’m sure you’ve heard that some nasty stuff went down a little while ago and I just want to do my best to explain how I got caught up in it. The first thing I want to say is that I’m very unhappy with the way it turned out and I’m doing everything I can to get it sorted out. Continue reading →

Justice Backers: Part One

~ Blaine Arcade ~ 11 Comments

(blurb)

It’s the mid 2010’s, justice systems grow ever more rigid as crime takes to the internet.  With a little help from a crowdfunding website, a newly forged team of superheroes is looking to fill in the gaps, and provide their backers with some cool merch along the way!

Get all the updates straight from each hero as they take on vicious trolls, a trading card blackmail ring, and an ancient fungal entity with its own world wide web in this trilogy of novellas that also work together as a book.

JusticeBackersCover

(reading time: 53 minutes) (reading time for entire novella: 3 hours, 22 minutes)

Justice Backers

by

Blaine Arcade

http://www.coinhat.com/justicebackers

($ $ $ $ * * * * * *) – ($4,344,823 dropped in $10,000,000 goal) – (26 days remain)

REMINDER – If ‘Justice Backers’ does not reach its $10,000,000 goal by October 6th of this year, the project will be canceled. Coinhat accepts all major credit cards as well as payments through Fundyfriend. Refunds are available up to 24 hours after pledge in most circumstances. Refunds may be offered for canceled, delayed, or altered projects on a case-by-case basis. Continue reading →